She Speaks Words – What Words do You Believe?

August 7, 2018

She Speaks Missy

She Speaks 2018 brought more than 800 women together. So many words were spoken! The Proverbs 31 team presented a beautiful illustration of how the enemy's words against us were overcome on Calvary. Do you know who God says you are? Read about it here.


She Speaks a LOT of Words!

20,000 words per day.  Supposedly, that is the number of words women speak.  If that “fact” is true, then She Speaks 2018 was the birthplace of approximately 40 million words over a two and a half day period of time!

Let’s math together, shall we?

Word Math

Approximately 800 women attended the conference.

800 women X 20,000 words = 16,000,000 words per day.

If you only consider pre-conference (half a day) and the actual conference (two days), you get the following:

16,000,000 words X 2.5 days = 40,000,000 words!!!

Quick disclaimer before we move on…that whole “fact” that women speak 20,000 words per day is actually a myth.  The rest of that little jewel is that men only speak about 7000 words per day. (HA!)  This “fake news” has been circulating for over a decade, but I found an article on the Scientific American website which said women say an average of 16,205 words per day, while men average about 15,669.

So, let’s re-math:

16,205 x 800 x 2.5 = 32,410,000 words for She Speaks 2018! (totally unofficial and unverified word count!)

Word Problems

For all the words being spoken aloud, I wonder how many remain unspoken.

The problem with the words that are unspoken is they are often negative.  If the She Speaks attendees could have walked around with thought bubbles above our heads, we would probably have seen words like these:

“What was I thinking? I don’t belong here.”

“I am so unqualified!”

“Look at her! She’s so put-together. I’m just a mess!”

“Who does she think she is anyway? She acts like she’s all that!

“I feel so selfish for leaving my family to come here.”

“Maybe it wasn’t Holy Spirit directing me to chase this dream. Maybe it was just me!”

“Everyone else here knows what they’re doing! Some of these women are even published authors/established speakers/strong leaders. I’m a phony!”

Do you see the problem here?  These words are NOT the words of a loving Father, but rather from our enemy who uses our insecurities, fear, and shame against us to keep us from following our calling.

She Speaks 2018

She Speaks is a conference held annually by Proverbs 31 Ministries in Concord, NC, near Charlotte. Lysa TerKeurst, New York Times Bestseller author, is the president of the ministry.

This is my second year to attend She Speaks, and I must say, I was much more prepared this year than last.  (You can read about last year’s conference here if you’d like.) . I went to NC fully anticipating a God encounter, and He did not disappoint!

So many new friendships were forged! I’ve made so many new connections with like-minded, Kingdom-focused women (and a few dudes) and look forward to maintaining those friendships.  I thought I’d share the photos of just a few of the new friends I’ve made:

She Speaks Sisters

Shandice, Lisa, and me

She Speaks Angela

My web designer, Angela!!!

She Speaks

Sharon Jaynes, P31 author/speaker

She Speaks friend

My new friend, Terry from Texas

She Speaks Joel

Joel, Theology Dude of P31

She Speaks Whitney

Love me some Whitney Capps of First 5!

She Speaks Nina

My new friend, Nina!

She Speaks Music

London Gatch and the Elevation Gang

I’m not so sure I got my 16,000 words in each day because I was soaking up every word spoken and absorbing as much information as my brain could hold! If I didn’t, it wasn’t from lack of trying!

At the Cross

When we all arrived and as we registered, we were encouraged to sign our names to a big 4X8 foot white board with the words “You Are” scrolled at the top. While I’m uncertain if everyone had the opportunity to sign, by the time the conference started on Friday morning, the board was covered in names.

As London Gatch and Elevation Worship led us in worship that morning, a couple of the P31 ladies began taking turns writing words over our signatures.

Overwhelmed.  Unwanted.  Unqualified.  Failure.  Not Enough.  Too Much.  Not Unique.  Broken.  Mistake.  Left Out.  Less Than.

She Speaks Cross

You Are…

LIES!  All lies of the enemy meant to enslave us and keep us from walking in our God-given purpose!!!

As the music played and the ladies wrote, you could hear women gasping as the all-too-familiar words appeared over our names.

I began to weep as I saw “Not Enough.”

But then, as we continued to worship, the ladies produced a large can of gold paint with a wide paintbrush.

The first swipe of the brush was vertical.  Of course, we knew.  The cross.

As the second, horizontal swipe was made, more of the lies were covered by the cross, and we rejoiced!

The CROSS!  God does not want us because of the cross.  He allowed the cross because he wanted us.

When we believe and receive the lies of the enemy, it is as if we are saying, “The cross was not enough for me.”

She Speaks Truth

What would we see if you had a thought bubble above your head?  What words do you think or say about yourself?  Are they words of life and grace, or are you prone to self-deprecation and negative self-talk?

What words have been spoken over you?  Have you been told you are worthy, chosen, adored, enough; or have you been berated or made to feel like you are unworthy, unwanted, unloved, not enough?

Who does God say you are?

You are CHOSEN! (1 Peter 2:9)

You are BELOVED! (Romans 9:25)

You are His DAUGHTER! (2 Corinthians 6:18)

You are TO DIE FOR!  (John 3:16)

So, sweet friend, the question I’d like to leave you with is this…

Whom are you going to believe?

The father of lies who wants to steal your joy and stand in the way of your calling?

Or will you believe your Father in Heaven who longs to give you life abundantly? (see John 10:10)




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